UPS AND DOWNS OF A FIRST BORNS BABYS

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As a new parent it’s a joy when you receive your long awaited bundle of joy, you call for celebration from the entire village hood they come to celebrate with you the  bundle of joy you have received from God.

We all know that having a first child is a new experience for a couple. So, they tend to look after their child, if possible 24 hours a day. Since, you get all the attention of your parents sometimes you feel like you don’t have much freedom at all and always guarded.

 I intend to think how many young parents know the entire challenges and many more   responsibilities your  bundle of joy will have to undergo through in order to make it at life.

It’s this questions that lead me to write this article just to encourage other First born babies like me  out there that God knew you and he knows your life from the beginning to the end.

Sometimes I get this phrase  whereby  many people says that “As a first born you do all the donkey work you go through much hardship ,you get a career job of your dream  and you starting helping your younger siblings and the rest of your family members sometimes  some First born  don’t even  go to school they save  money to take their  siblings to school they go to school they  get a  career jobs of their dreams they  became richer  than there fist born siblings. I intend to disagree with what people tend to think.

  I believe that First born babies In a Biblical point of  view are very important. There are special privileges and advantages that belong to the oldest child. Also, the first born allotted a double portion of inheritance and the judicial authority from his/her father.

As a first born baby you are with Love - I am not saying that other siblings were not born with love but usually the first born is the fruit of the first love, true love and fiery love. If you are born  your birth date is the most awaited moment of your parents and other family members. 

The first born, were usually filled with love, attention and care. All things are new. From infant clothes, shoes, toys, mattresses, etc.It seems like you are “first” in everything. I love the fact that am a firstborn and a I enjoy being one although there so many  obstacles all is well

Firstborns are the natural movers, shakers, and leaders of the world. They can accomplish anything they set their minds to. They're the high achievers, 

But if they're out of balance, they can be overly perfectionist, driven, and critical. They can become controllers (everything has to go their way) or pleasers (they exhaust themselves in meeting the demands of others).

You have to experience everything first, the younger one can learn from your mistakes. They're usually favoured, you get blamed if a fight breaks out. More "responsibility."

As an oldest child you gain respect from your younger siblings. They always consider your ideas and thoughts before making any final decision in family issues.

As the oldest child, you are expected to be a model to your younger siblings and it is not an easy task. If you grown in a poor family, you are in-charge with them. I used to look after my Sisters  at the very early age. Prepared their milk, giving them bath and put them to sleep. Bad thing is, if there’s something happen to them ” it’s your fault”.

in my younger days in lower classes i use to wake up early in the morning  to prepare myself for school because my mother is attending my little Sister . On the other hand, being the oldest child shaped and has made me to be responsible almost in everything. It is somehow a nice feeling that your younger siblings is looking at your footprints. 

If you love them, you need to be a good model. When I was in High School, I always keep some money from my allowance and buy some bread for them. They are always happy every time I came home from school. For me, being the oldest child is a continuous responsibility wherein in some point I am disabling them to stand with their own. 

But contrary to what younger siblings may feel, all is not well in the world of the first-born either. Granted, the first-born enjoys the undivided attention of his parents and possibly grand parents too; and as first-born, he will occupy a very special place in their hearts forever and ever.
His/Her  every wish is treated like a command, his/her  every whim is pandered to and he will have the advantage of enjoying their boundless energy, patience and enthusiasm, the stock of which like the law of diminishing returns, gradually depletes with every subsequent addition to the family.
The first-born is also the parents’ live experiment and has to bear the brunt of their untried parenting skillsMuch as one would like to deny it and insist that every child is equally special, the first-born is more special than those that follow and his every milestone is recorded, remembered, cherished and even revered! But alas! The first-born is also the parents’ live experiment and has to bear the brunt of their untried parenting skills, their ignorance, their paranoia, fears and live up to their expectations and aspirations.
 
Very often the first-born has to experience the hardships that young parents have to undergo while establishing themselves in their careers. If young parents have a money crunch, many a first-born has to wait for things that come easier for the second or third child. 

As the torch-bearer for the next generation, first-born has to be the epitome of all that is best so that younger siblings can follow in his wake. So while a younger sibling can run around the doctor’s clinic, screaming his fear of the impending injection, the first-born has to stoically bare his arm and bear the pain..

Parents also tend to unburden their woes on the first-born who then has to act as counselor
The first-born has the burden of being responsible for his siblings and often has to baby sit, mentor and protect the younger ones. In some homes, the first-born who enjoys the privilege of the best education often has to support the younger ones and contribute to their education as well. 

Parents also tend to unburden their woes on the first-born who then has to act as counselor monitoring/guidance can be stifling for many a first-born who envies the freedom and lack of expectations that younger siblings enjoy.

I love being first born and I thank God that am one I wanna be good role model to my younger siblings an adviser to them and achieve my dreams and set a path to them and proof to the rest of the world that your can be an achiever also as a first born and not as a slave to your younger ones as many people says.

Evelyne Maina

PATHWAY TO SUCCESS

Many of us get excited when we begin the journey towards an objective (say on New Year’s day) but we soon give up afterwards. The main reason we don’t follow through is because deep down, we fear failure. If we were 100% certain the outcome would be a success, we would ALL pursue our goals. However on a subconscious level, we simply don’t believe the goal is achievable

Have absolute faith

Before any long-term goal is fulfilled, you must first visualise it and write it down (keep it safe and read it as often as possible). Dreams that aren’t written down end up as just that – dreams. The test is to discover a way to replace doubt with unwavering confidence. You have to be convinced that you will succeed against the odds.

Draw up a plan of action

Assembling a plan that tracks your progress (step by step) is the best way forward because following an organised schedule will eliminate choice. If you are losing weight it’s sensible to stick to a healthy eating and exercise plan or if you are saving money, it’s wise to write down exactly how much cash you will need per day and keep tabs on extra costs. Be realistic and give yourself a sensible target to reach. Remember everyone’s journey is different. Your challenge will feel less daunting once you have divided your journey into a weekly operation. 

 

Start your journey

Countless people make excuses about their inability to achieve a goal without taking any initiative whatsoever. We may desire to lose weight but if we don’t bother to find out where our local gym is, how can we achieve anything?

At other times, we magnify our flaws to such an extent that we actually talk ourselves out of taking action. But rather than focusing on our perceived shortcomings, it’s best to make an enquiry into how we can start.

Rome was not built in a day. Massive goals are achieved one baby step at a time. The only way to combat your doubt is through ACTION. And every time you complete one step, celebrate it as you deserve it!

Set your plan into motion and evaluate it

Acting out a set of positive habits will bring you closer to your goals. If you have a gym class on Tuesday and Thursday, ensure your schedule is free or if you are saving money, transfer funds into an account that you can’t touch.

Adhere to your plan and evaluate it to assess how well you are performing at regular intervals. Always make changes when your plan fails to meet your expectations.

Celebrate Each Successful Step

Your consistent efforts will gradually bear results. And this is the exciting part: imagine how fantastic you will feel when you see how far you have come! It will fuel your enthusiasm to keep moving forward.

Compiled by Evelyne

Source NET

YOUTHS HAVING IT!!!!

You are living in Nairobi you must have seen the ‘pornographic’ Blurred Lines poster by Mavuno church. If you have been living under a rock, I’ll explain. The poster features a man holding a woman and the woman lifting her legs provocatively. It also features local slang popular with teenagers such as ‘you can gerrit’ — 

From the P-Unit’s song You Guy and basically means’ you can have sex’ and other popular songs like Robin Thicke’s Blurred Lines and Rihanna’s Friends with the Monster. 

Would you believe the vitriol and scorn poured upon the church and the pastors over that poster! I mean Nairobians took to twitter, Facebook and even radio stations to curse and condemn the church for ‘coolifying’ their church and using sex to sell their church. Some even predicted the end times nearing! I am a practical girl, so I love to deal in facts
. Here we go; 

Fact number one: Teenagers are having sex. They are breaking their virginity as early as 11 years old. Sorry, you have a thirteen year old? Too bad, she could be gerring-it more times a week than you do. Sad, but true.
Fact number two: Teens are not only having sex, they are recording it for their friends, and they taking photos of themselves stark naked and they are sharing hard-core pornographic materials. You don’t believe me? Check your son’s WhatsApp timeline.

This “Blurred Lines’ Mavuno poster only scratches the surface in regards to what teens do these days, they “gerrit’ like every day, and the boundaries we are taught in Sunday school have now become “blurred lines”.
What’s more, they have read 50 shades of grey cover to cover and know more styles than all of us put together. What the poster merely does is to remind us that these teens we call kids are not kids anymore, but young people in need of help and guidance.

 Keep your religious theories and Bible verses to yourself, because the truth is, teens are humping each other left, right and center (pun intended) and your ‘World is coming to an end’ theory does not apply here.

We are making fools of ourselves condemning Pastor Murithi Wanjau (teens call him Pastor M) and the Mavuno church for ‘showing porn to children’, while the truth really is Pastor M and Co. are just telling us what we do not want to hear. Teens are having sex! And there you are, seated there pretending that your teens are still the same pure little virgins born 15 years ago. 

Well, there are those Nairobians with a rare kind of hypocrisy and stupidity that say the poster promotes sex among teens. I don’t even know what to tell you, except that you need a brain transplant.  I am no theology student but I know one of the hallmarks of evangelism is to start from where people are and then lead them to Christ. If Christ mixed with prostitutes and tax collectors, then the poster has every right to address the teens in the language they best understand.

Those pair of legs on that poster is not even close to what teenagers  watch on television. Have you seen how your teenage daughter tweaks like there’s no tomorrow, how she gyrates her booty against that teenage boy like the world is ending tonight? You think Robin Thicke’s song ‘Blurred lines’ is porn? You clearly haven’t caught your teen watching Macka Diamond’s “Dye Dye Dye” and Busy Signal’s ‘Bedroom Bully’.

This is not about that ill-fated poster. Far from it. This is about the state of our society. The fact that parents have failed in teaching their children the truth about sex and simplifying such a glorious activity to just birds and bees. This is about the fact that teens-no, your teen, needs help in demystifying this thing called sex.

 For instance; why it sounds and probably feels so much better without a condom and why sex with the same person gets boring at some point. I know it’s a tall order to ask you to talk to your teen about sex, so why not let those have the guts to tackle the elephant in the room?

SOURCE : NJOKI CHEGE