UPS AND DOWNS OF A FIRST BORNS BABYS

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As a new parent it’s a joy when you receive your long awaited bundle of joy, you call for celebration from the entire village hood they come to celebrate with you the  bundle of joy you have received from God.

We all know that having a first child is a new experience for a couple. So, they tend to look after their child, if possible 24 hours a day. Since, you get all the attention of your parents sometimes you feel like you don’t have much freedom at all and always guarded.

 I intend to think how many young parents know the entire challenges and many more   responsibilities your  bundle of joy will have to undergo through in order to make it at life.

It’s this questions that lead me to write this article just to encourage other First born babies like me  out there that God knew you and he knows your life from the beginning to the end.

Sometimes I get this phrase  whereby  many people says that “As a first born you do all the donkey work you go through much hardship ,you get a career job of your dream  and you starting helping your younger siblings and the rest of your family members sometimes  some First born  don’t even  go to school they save  money to take their  siblings to school they go to school they  get a  career jobs of their dreams they  became richer  than there fist born siblings. I intend to disagree with what people tend to think.

  I believe that First born babies In a Biblical point of  view are very important. There are special privileges and advantages that belong to the oldest child. Also, the first born allotted a double portion of inheritance and the judicial authority from his/her father.

As a first born baby you are with Love - I am not saying that other siblings were not born with love but usually the first born is the fruit of the first love, true love and fiery love. If you are born  your birth date is the most awaited moment of your parents and other family members. 

The first born, were usually filled with love, attention and care. All things are new. From infant clothes, shoes, toys, mattresses, etc.It seems like you are “first” in everything. I love the fact that am a firstborn and a I enjoy being one although there so many  obstacles all is well

Firstborns are the natural movers, shakers, and leaders of the world. They can accomplish anything they set their minds to. They're the high achievers, 

But if they're out of balance, they can be overly perfectionist, driven, and critical. They can become controllers (everything has to go their way) or pleasers (they exhaust themselves in meeting the demands of others).

You have to experience everything first, the younger one can learn from your mistakes. They're usually favoured, you get blamed if a fight breaks out. More "responsibility."

As an oldest child you gain respect from your younger siblings. They always consider your ideas and thoughts before making any final decision in family issues.

As the oldest child, you are expected to be a model to your younger siblings and it is not an easy task. If you grown in a poor family, you are in-charge with them. I used to look after my Sisters  at the very early age. Prepared their milk, giving them bath and put them to sleep. Bad thing is, if there’s something happen to them ” it’s your fault”.

in my younger days in lower classes i use to wake up early in the morning  to prepare myself for school because my mother is attending my little Sister . On the other hand, being the oldest child shaped and has made me to be responsible almost in everything. It is somehow a nice feeling that your younger siblings is looking at your footprints. 

If you love them, you need to be a good model. When I was in High School, I always keep some money from my allowance and buy some bread for them. They are always happy every time I came home from school. For me, being the oldest child is a continuous responsibility wherein in some point I am disabling them to stand with their own. 

But contrary to what younger siblings may feel, all is not well in the world of the first-born either. Granted, the first-born enjoys the undivided attention of his parents and possibly grand parents too; and as first-born, he will occupy a very special place in their hearts forever and ever.
His/Her  every wish is treated like a command, his/her  every whim is pandered to and he will have the advantage of enjoying their boundless energy, patience and enthusiasm, the stock of which like the law of diminishing returns, gradually depletes with every subsequent addition to the family.
The first-born is also the parents’ live experiment and has to bear the brunt of their untried parenting skillsMuch as one would like to deny it and insist that every child is equally special, the first-born is more special than those that follow and his every milestone is recorded, remembered, cherished and even revered! But alas! The first-born is also the parents’ live experiment and has to bear the brunt of their untried parenting skills, their ignorance, their paranoia, fears and live up to their expectations and aspirations.
 
Very often the first-born has to experience the hardships that young parents have to undergo while establishing themselves in their careers. If young parents have a money crunch, many a first-born has to wait for things that come easier for the second or third child. 

As the torch-bearer for the next generation, first-born has to be the epitome of all that is best so that younger siblings can follow in his wake. So while a younger sibling can run around the doctor’s clinic, screaming his fear of the impending injection, the first-born has to stoically bare his arm and bear the pain..

Parents also tend to unburden their woes on the first-born who then has to act as counselor
The first-born has the burden of being responsible for his siblings and often has to baby sit, mentor and protect the younger ones. In some homes, the first-born who enjoys the privilege of the best education often has to support the younger ones and contribute to their education as well. 

Parents also tend to unburden their woes on the first-born who then has to act as counselor monitoring/guidance can be stifling for many a first-born who envies the freedom and lack of expectations that younger siblings enjoy.

I love being first born and I thank God that am one I wanna be good role model to my younger siblings an adviser to them and achieve my dreams and set a path to them and proof to the rest of the world that your can be an achiever also as a first born and not as a slave to your younger ones as many people says.

Evelyne Maina